Monday, November 22, 2010

Week 11

Teaching a Teen to Drive

You hit a tree the first time you backed up a standard; it was your brothers pick-up and with three pedals to choose from you mistook the gas as the brake. It could have happened to anyone. You still knew best. Seventy years behind the wheel, or has it only been thirty or maybe just seventeen; oh well, doesn’t really matter, you know best.

He’s your friend’s son and he’s fresh off the market with a permit in his hand. No car of his own, the only transportation he’s been in control of has been his ten speed and he only learned to handle that four years ago (all those gears to choose from). His parent’s wash their hands of his training and they put their trust in you, his teacher.

“Let him drive? Never. He’s my baby!”

“I’m standing right here Mom, you are acting like I’m still five. Trust me, I can do this.”

***

Your brother taught you to spin donuts in his van. Your mom hid in the back seat when you ventured out onto Main Street. Your first speeding ticket came two months after you got your license for going 64 in a 30; but you know best. So, you take your friends son out on Old Route 1 and hand him the keys.

He buckles his seatbelt but forgets to adjust his mirrors; you speak up. He puts it into drive and pulls out without looking; you clear your throat. He drives between the lines but gets the speed odometer a good 40 slashes above the law; you grab the ‘oh shit’ bar.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve drove; my dad has taken me before.”

“Pull over. Give me the keys. We’ll try again another time.”

***

“Mum, you’ve gotta take me driving…this poor sap just can’t swing it.”

“Sorry hun, I just can’t.”

You’ve decided you will take him out again, but he’s going to listen to you and do things your way. You have several years on him - so you have the experience. You tell him:

“We have less then five months to teach you how to drive. Each week we will work on one part of becoming a safe driver.”

He’s excited, eager, trusting and ready to learn. He knows how to drive a little and goes to you willingly - completely unaware of your plan.

***
Week one:

“I want you to think about the steering wheel; how it operates the steering mechanisms of the vehicle thus allowing you to maneuver within the limits of the yellow and white lines - of which we will later cover the varieties and significances of.”

He roles his eyes and lets out a sigh but his enthusiasm and trust wins out and he thinks.

Week two:

You unveil the next lesson. Followed with some fantastic examples of what you have done; exhibiting your vast array of expertise. You conclude with a handwritten list of what not to do; what you do not want to see, hear, experience or have him try. You leave him to his thoughts.

***

The weeks follow and he’s made a few attempts behind the wheel. Some successful ventures and some….well, lets just say it’s a comfort knowing there were seatbelts. He’s listening to you, hears your stories of your experiences and is doing his best to follow your ‘not-to-do’ list. He’s trying.

“I really appreciate you taking me out to drive, mom still does not dare. I can‘t wait to test for my license; I’m dying to take a bunch of friends out. ”

“My mother never took me either. I told you about the time I got the speeding ticket right?”

“Yep.”

“There was this time I went with a bunch of friends too. We went to Branch Pond after work to have a few drinks, it was a ritual the closing crew did where I worked. I didn’t drive thankfully so I knew I could have a few. Haha, what a joke that was - we forgot to get a d.d. so it was the least drunk who had to drive us all out. That was me. Yep, I learned pretty quick how to handle a car with a buzz.”

***

This wasn’t the first kid you taught to drive. In fact you had taught several. Your methods have worked in the past, or, in your opinion, they had…so you thought it was best to stick with the plan - even though you noticed he was having troubles. You had faith. You knew he would get it.

“I don’t get it. How am I going to figure out a standard if we don’t try one?”

“Why do you want to try a standard? Most cars are automatics now.”

***

Time is moving along quickly and his permit time is almost up and he has a few more hours left to fill. His frustration grows and he asks you questions, comments on your methods and wonders what he can do because there are still things he doesn’t get that he will need to know; parking on hills, night driving, parallel parking…he knew he needed help.

You were confident. You met his questions with questions. You challenged his fears with quick responses and you filled his mind with more of your past experiences and those of your buddies. After a few trips out on the road, your list of what not to do grows as does your frustration of his inability to follow your plan or his lack of trying (as it appears to you).

“Please take me parallel parking, I know it will be a part of my driving test.”

“Let’s try driving on ‘95 first. Next week we will drive up North so you can get some long distance driving in! Did I tell you about that trip I took in the snowstorm and almost hit a pole? …”

***

The following week came and went and he did not show up. The next few weeks went by and your frustration grew. You heard his complaints through his mother and it angered you; after all you were only trying to help him. You contact him on face book and say:

“Let’s drive.”

Six days later he contacts you.

“I can’t. I’m too scared. It’s almost time for our training to be done. I’m having troubles. I’m never gonna get this, I’ll never figure it out.”

***

Your frustration has peaked. Your tired of trying. He does not appreciate your efforts. Screw it. Why do you care if he learns to drive, after all, who needs another teen on the road?

“I’m done. Get your mother to help you with your last hours.”

“She won’t, please help.”

***

Sixteen (and a half), crisp new laminated card in his wallet. He’s driving his friends home (he’s the least buzzed), it’s snowing pretty heavily and the car starts sliding out of control. He wrangles with it and nearly misses a telephone pole. He and his buddies breath a sigh of relief, crack up laughing, and gun it. Four miles down the road he is pulled over for speeding 64 in a 30.

You have succeeded.

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